


A Pirate's Life For Me

by hilandmum



Category: The Princess Bride - William Goldman
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-25
Updated: 2014-07-25
Packaged: 2018-02-10 07:52:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2016951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hilandmum/pseuds/hilandmum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Buttercup and Westley have settled down on the farm with their two daughters when two old friends show up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Pirate's Life For Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Missy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/gifts).



> For Missy: I also adore the novel, the movie, and, in both, Inigo and Fezzik. I hope you enjoy this.

A Pirate's Life For Me

Buttercup carried a bucket of water into the farmhouse she shared with her husband and children. It was her parents old farm, the one where Westley worked hard throughout her childhood. She swiped at some strands of blond hair that had fallen into her eyes.

"Buttercup, is that you?" Westley entered the kitchen from the hall that led to the other rooms of the house. 

She smiled. "And who else would it be?"

He helped her lift the full bucket to the hearth and pour some into a large kettle. (This was after hearths and kettles). "You look tired."

"I'm alright." She shrugged. 

Westley pulled her close and kissed her. Every time they kissed, it was the most wonderful kiss ever, better than the last. "Something is bothering you."

She pursed her lips. "Westley, do you ever think back to the adventures we had? I know it wasn't all fun and laughter, but it wasn't so..."

"...boring? I thought this was the life you wanted. Relaxing, happy with no worries or enemies."

She nodded. "It was. Is."

"We have children now. It wouldn't do for us to run off looking for excitement."

To prove his point, two tow-headed children ran through the room and then outside.

Buttercup and Westley grinned until the older girl returned.

"Mother, Father, Daff took my ball." (This was after balls, but not bats. They came much later).

"And how did she do that, Waverly?" Buttercup turned to smile at Westley, then returned her attention to her daughter. "She's only four, and you're seven."

"Well, she did!" The girl chased her sister out the door again. "Give that back to..."

The clop of horses coming into the clearing brought Buttercup and Westley outside. They smiled when they recognized the visitors, a swarthy man with a big black mustache and long, curly black hair, and a giant of a man whose sheer size made his stallion look like a pony.

The smaller of the men dismounted and grasped Westley's arms with both hands. "My good friend. How good it is to see you once more. So good!"

"Inigo, what brings you to these parts? I thought you were asea." He glanced at his children. 

"So I was."

"You have a ship?" Waverly forgot about chasing her little sister. "Do you travel far? Have you seen any PIRATES?"

Inigo grinned. "This can't be your daughter, can it?"

By this time Fezzik had dismounted and approached Buttercup. "Hello, pretty lady!"

"Hello." She beamed at him. "We've missed you both!"

Daff hid behind her mother's long skirt, but peaked out at him. 

"So what brings the two of you here?" Buttercup asked. 

Inigo lifted his shoulders and dropped them again. "We've had eight long years aboard the Revenge, but now it's time to give that up."

"But why come here?" Westley asked.

"We thought you might want your old job back." 

Buttercup blinked, while Westley's eyes went wide, either with fright or surprise, or possibly both. "You want me to..." He swallowed hard and looked at the two children who watched Inigo and Fezzick with unabashed interest. "I...I couldn't. I'm a happily married family man, with responsibilities and...and..." (Of course, marriage had been around even longer than hearths and kettles).

"But you were so good at it. Surely it would be like putting on an old suit of clothes, one that fit you better than those baggy trousers and shirt." Inigo pointed to his friend's attire.

Buttercup smiled, remembering what a dashing hero the Man in Black made. "Oh, Westley, wouldn't it be fun to take up that life again?"

"What life, Mama?" little Daffodil asked. 

Her mother explained, but only vaguely. "Oh, you know, sailing the seas, catching the scent of seawater on the breeze, living on fish and anything else we can catch."

"Will there be pirates?" Waverly asked.

"You seem to be fixated on those, child. What is your name again?"

"Waverly, sir." 

"Ah, yes, and a good name that is." Inigo returned his attention to Westley. "So, what do you say? It wouldn't have to be forever, you know." 

"I notice you didn't last long at it." Westley crossed his arms.

"We can come with you." Fezzik voice still held the thick accent it always had, but they'd gotten used to it. "Back to the Revenge."

"And who will raise our kids?" Westley frowned.

A grin spread across Fezzik's face as he looked down at the two children. "I am always good with children." He bent down as far as he could, which wasn't far enough to go eye-to-eye with Daff. "Hello, pretty little girl."

She poked a finger in her mouth and looked up at him shyly.

"Daffodil, this is a friend of ours. His name is Fezzik." Buttercup smiled at her daughter.

Daff took the finger out and said, "Hi."

If anything, Fezzik's smile became broader still. 

"Are you two willing to remain here with them while we go off for a little while?" Buttercup asked Inigo.

"Both of us?" Inigo frowned. He looked at the older girl, a miniature version of Buttercup. "Why don't we take 'em with us?"

"That's not a life for children!" Buttercup rested her hands on her hips. "No, if we do this, they stay here." 

"I can take care of them both myself," Fezzik offered. 

Westley sighed. "We'll have to think about this."

"And in the meantime." His wife smiled at their visitors, the most beautiful smile in the world. Some said that belonged to a raven-haired woman in France, but they'd be wrong. "Come share our dinner with us." She led the way inside the farmhouse, and stirred the pot. (This was after pots, which necessarily came before stew. Otherwise, there would have been no way to cook it.). "Girls, set the table."

The men took seats on the benches on either side of the wood table. (This was after benches but long before chairs, which was good, because Fezzik wouldn't have fit in any chair, not even a throne.)

"This is the best soup." Fezzik pointed to his bowl of the stuff with a chunk of fresh bread. He didn't say 'the best soup I ever ate' or 'the best soup anyone ever made'. (Soup, of course, was first created by a woman in Guilder long after stew. She had to stretch the meal she'd made her family to feed two dozen soldiers bent on rape and plunder. Her family wondered why she didn't give them any until the soldiers started dropping like house flies from the arsenic she put in the soup.)

"You haven't laced this with arsenic or iocane powder, have you?" Inigo was cautious to a fault, although usually he trusted his friends.

Buttercup smiled at him, a radiant smile that calmed him. "Of course not." She pointed to the smaller bowls in front of her children. "Would I give this to them if there was anything wrong with it?"

Inigo's eyes narrowed as if he was thinking that over. "I suppose you could have made sure they'd developed an immunity as their father did."

"I could have," she said sweetly. "Eat your soup, Inigo. You'll need your strength if you're to take over the care and feeding of these two."

The soup devoured, they sat around the table reminiscing about old times. Waverly's and Daffodil's eyes grew larger and large until they threatened to overtake their foreheads and noses.

Finally, Westley summarized, "So, are we agreed? You will tend to these two, and Buttercup and I will sail the Revenge."

Inigo grinned at him. "And when you return, we can compare who had a harder or more pleasant time."

But Buttercup was not quite ready to relinquish her children to the two men. "You'll make sure they wash behind their ears?" She had as hard a time enforcing that as her parents had with her. "And that they eat their peas?" (This was after peas, but before spinach or she would have required that as well).

"Absolutely."

She looked at Westley. "Then I suppose we'll do this. How does six months sound?"

"Make it nine and we have a deal."

The four adults shook hands on the plan. And so it came to pass that Westley and Buttercup sailed off into the sunset while Inigo and Fezzik remained on the farm, caring for two small girls.


End file.
